201508180935命運 Destiny

(五) 命運    Destiny--

 

 有個算命先生對阿呆說:人各有命,就是天地萬物都各有其命,比如說,你桌上的這只茶壺也有它的命運。

 

啊?真的?! 那你告訴我這茶壺的命如何?阿呆詑異的說。

這茶壺啊,它活不过明天中午12 點。 是啊?!

從那時起,阿呆就一直注意那個茶壺。到了第二天中午,他更是盯著那只茶壺。

 

樓下他奶奶在大聲叫他下樓吃飯了,他回答說:好!馬上來! 过了一會兒他奶奶又叫他吃飯了,他又回答說:好!馬上!

 

过了一會兒他奶奶杵著拐棍上樓來說:你這孩子,倒底在幹什麼?為什麼不下來吃飯?!

 

阿呆目不轉睛地兩眼緊盯著茶壺看也不看他奶奶一眼的說:好啦!馬上就來!

 

突然她奶奶氣忿地舉起拐棍,「啪!」的一聲把那茶壺打破了!

 

阿呆抬起頭來看牆上的鐘,剛好是12 點整!

 

 

 

Destiny-- -- --

 

A fortuneteller told Joshua saying that every body and every thing in the world has its destiny, for instance this china teapot on your table also has its destiny.

 

 Oh yea? Joshua said: then tell me what is the teapot’s destiny?

 

 

Fortuneteller said: this teapot’s life can’t last over tomorrow noon 12 clock.

 

 

Is that so? Joshua said.

 

 

Since then, Joshua looked at that teapot all the time, when it’s the noon of next day, he looked at the teapot closely.

 

 

His grandma was yelling downstairs: Joshua, come down for lunch now!

 

 

Joshua answered: Ok, I’ll be there soon.

 

 

Joshua still looked at the teapot, he wanted to see what going to happen to the teapot.

 

 

After for a while, his grandma called him again: come down for lunch!

 

 

OK! I’ll come down soon!

 

 

After for a while, his grandma came to upstairs with her cane.

 

 

“ You little rascal! What you are doing here? Why you don’t want to come down?” his grandma was very mad and said: “what you keep looking at the damn teapot for?”

 

 

“ Ok---Ok--- Just a minute, I’ll be downstairs soon!”

 

 

“ Pa! “ grandma broke the teapot with her cane and yelled: “ what the hell you keep looking at the damn teapot for?”

 

 

Joshua looked up the clock on the wall, it is exactly 12 o’clock!

 

 

<![if !supportLists]>1.   <![endif]>媒婆 The match maker

 

老王:你给我介绍的姑娘,有一只眼睛是瞎的!

媒婆:对啊!

老王:你骗我,你当初为什么没告诉我!

媒婆:我怎么没告诉你了!当时我说,那个姑娘一眼就看中你了!!

 

Match maker

 

Mr. Wang: The girl you introduced to me, she has one eye bland.

Match maker: Yes.

Mr. Wang: You cheated me, why you didn’t tell me before?

Match maker: Who said I didn’t tell you? I told you the girl one eye (Chinese also means one look) fallen in love with you. -- -- -- in English means: she falls in love with you at first sight!

 

 

<![if !supportLists]>2.   <![endif]>法師求雨 the wizard

 

村子裡鬧旱災,村長找了法師求雨。

村長問何時才能有雨啊!

法師遞給村長一張紙條,並吩咐道:天机不可洩漏,只有下雨那天才能打開看。

不久果然下雨了!村長連忙興奮的打開紙條,只見上面寫道:今日有雨。

村長感嘆到,真是神準啊!

 

The Wizard

 

The village is suffering a serious drought, they asked a wizard to perform the rain-seeking ritual.

The chief of the village asked the wizard: When it will rain?

The wizard gave the chief an envelope with a massage in it.

And he told the chief: It’s the heaven secrets mustn’t be revealed. You can’t open it until it rains.

Later time it really rained, the chief was so excited, and he opened up the envelope, the massage says: It will rain today!

The chief of the village highly praised: Oh! How efficacious the wizard is!

 

 

<![if !supportLists]>3.   <![endif]>習慣動作The nature habit
 
市長帶兩個隨從爬山,不慎掉入懸崖;三人同時抓住一根藤條; 但藤條不能同時承重三人 
市長說:你們誰鬆手? 兩隨從同時回答:不鬆!市長無奈道:好吧,既然我是領導;捨己救人是應该的!你們獲救後;要在自己的崗位上好好的工作;不要辜負了組織和人民的期望!好,我的演講完了!
語音剛剛結束,兩個随從立即習慣地鼓掌叫好....……

 

 

 

The nature habit
 

 

The mayor and two subordinate followers went to claim mountain, an accident happened they all fall from the cliff! The three guys all grabbed at one climbing vine, but the vine can’t support three guys’ weight.

The mayor said: Will you two give up your grab?

The two answered: No!

The mayor said reluctantly: OK, I’m the leader, I should scarify myself to save the other’s lives, after you got out, I hope you two work hard for the people, don’t let the government down and fail to live up people’s expectations!... … OK, my speech finished!

Then the two followers naturally clap their hands as usually as they do.

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